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I had one last drink the next weekend, and for three years I haven't touched alcohol. We live in a culture of consumerism. More clothes, more technology, more alcohol. But how does that fit with building for the future and having plans and ambition? What about measuring success on what you offer to the world and your community, rather than what you take home at the end of the week, or the materialistic goods you consume? It's hard for young people caught in this battle every day, with messages that it's the most important time in their life to both work hard to create a future and have the best time of their lives too.
In this consumer culture, it's so normal to skip from partner to partner, to always be consuming.
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This world won't tell you that you can be happy single. I think a lot of people miss that in the mindless consumption of wanting and needing everything now in this world. And chasing girls often falls under that consumer culture. I want to summarise my life since. These are my experiences, both good and bad, of going three years sober:.
Missing the nights out, laughs, saying ridiculous things and meeting new people. I loved this and sometimes miss it. Unbelievably, I can do almost as well sober.
Yes, it is part of the extended investment in time when drinking well. But the brain-numbed inactive relaxation that a day on the couch, watching rubbish and chatting about the night before, forced me to relax. If you know me I am always on the go trying to do something so find it hard to unwind sometimes. Sometimes these can be funny, but I think in some ways it's because it confronts people with their relationship with alcohol. What's wrong with you? Are you an alcoholic?
I've learned more about when to tell people, when I first meet someone it's easier to pass off an excuse like I'm driving, or up early coaching tomorrow. When I meet people I don't want this to be one of the main first impressions I give, but maybe I need to rethink this too. This was the primary reason or final catalyst to quit drinking. Instead of getting drunk every weekend in New Zealand, I chose to go to the World Cup in Brazil, teach English in Budapest and now develop my marketing and futsal coaching careers in Manchester. These things wouldn't have happened if I was still getting drunk in New Zealand every weekend.
The empty calories in alcohol and associated takeaways at 5am and through a hungover Sunday would have a big effect on the other six days of health in the rest of the week. My diet now largely consists of lean protein like chicken, fish and eggs, complex brown carbohydrates like brown rice, and a lot of vegetables, fresh, frozen and salads. My body feels amazing for it. My typical weekend consists of coaching on Friday nights for two and a half hours and on Sunday mornings or three hours.
I've also achieved 20 full days of four weeks full time of coach education on top of working full time in six months in Manchester. This wouldn't have been possible with the time commitment of drinking well.
I went through a deep personal branding exercise getting feedback from people that know me best. Alcohol only brings out what is in you, it isn't some magic external personality. That's why it does different things to different people - some are happy drunks, some are angry drunks. Not that I should let this determine how I live or affect all my decisions in itself. But it's a nice bonus, and being a positive role model to young players that I coach is important to me.
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It's part of teaching life skills through futsal and developing better people through sport. Turning up hungover on a Sunday morning to coach simply isn't an option for me. Let's count the hangover here too. I worked hard during the week into the evenings so I didn't allow myself much free time there. So if you have the weekend of about 32 hours of awake hours.
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That's 32 hours of time you have to play with in a week. I'd waste close to half of that getting drunk or being hungover. Half of my disposable life outside of work was given to alcohol. Yes, I miss a little of the shenanigans. But I still have fun. And the benefits above far outweigh the costs. I haven't signed up for a life of no alcohol. I can only say that in this moment in time it's what I want to do. And it's not for everyone. I can't tell you what to do with your time here on this round ball as we circle the bright ball.
But I can say that a time away, even a month from alcohol, is a good way to have a look at your relationship with it. You might decide your drinking is good and brings you positives, that's your call. Matt Fejos blogs about futsal, psychology and life at www. Getting our kids back into sport could keep them from crime. Tell us about your best Kiwi holiday. What can be done to prevent fatal police chases? Do you grow your own fruit and veges?
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